After four visits to Sri Lanka, I believe I have
gathered enough experience to write a short how-to-guide, hopefully
minimalizing your chances of getting swindled as it had happened to me on
several occasions.
So, here it goes:
1.Memorize the
number of the tuk tuk. Always. That way, if the worst happens, meaning you
ending up in a strange alley at night, and being mugged, you know exactly who
to report to the police. This actually really happened to my friend. The
culprit was found and she got all her stolen documents back.
2.Always ask the
driver if the tuk tuk meter is working. If the driver says yes, hop in. If
he says no, wait for another one. When I first visited Sri Lanka, I tried to
negotiate the price with the driver because the meter wasn’t working, but ended
up being swindled, because when we’d reach or destination, he’d add 50% to the
price. Just because.
Another thing that can happen is that he lies to you
that the meter is working and then, after the first 100 meters, he will put on
an act that it has broken down, and then, he will want you to pay double.
If you see that the meter isn’t working, ask the
driver to stop, get off and wait for another tuk tuk, which is absolutely no
problem, because there is literally thousands of them everywhere.
3.Make sure that
you have a navigation app installed
on your smart phone and use it while
driving in a tuk tuk. (My personal favorite is MapFactor Navigator)
Firstly, the tuk tuk drivers cannot read maps. So,
even if you show them an actual map and explain everything, step by step, they
will just say ‘’yes, yes’’ and take you someplace they think is right. My
experience has shown that their hunch is usually wrong.
Secondly, their English is really really bad. They
only understand the words ‘’right’’ or ‘’left.’’ The problem is, if you’re not
sure where you’re going, how can they know where to take you? And I know, now
you’re thinking: ‘’well, they are locals, of course they should know the city
on the back of their hand.’’ You could not be more wrong. They haven’t got a
clue where they’re going. Seriously. So, help yourself to the latest technology
of the 21st century and use GPS on your smartphone to give them
instructions while they drive.
By the way, the navigation app will also prevent you
from getting swindled, as the tuk tuk drivers tend to take the longest route to
your destination, sometimes making a full circle around your destination,
trying to take as much of your money as possible. This way, you can see the
false route of the tuk tuk quite clearly on your smartphone. In this case, you
should tell them to stop the vehicle, pay them and go about your way.
4.Do not argue
with the tuk tuk drivers. Even if you know that you are being swindled.
Just pay the man those extra 100, 200 rupees (around 1 euro) and go about your
life. Why?
Firstly, you are usually outnumbered, as his
‘’homies’’ are only a shout away. Secondly, the tuk tuk drivers are connected
with the local mafia. Do you really want them on your back? I know that it’s
not fair, but this is Sri Lanka, there is no fair play here. Only survival of
the fittest.
Which brings me to my third point, if you refuse to
pay the extra (like I did, and like so many had done before me), thinking ‘’I
will not let the guy swindle me, 100 rupees or not, it’s a matter of
principle.’’ You are in for a treat. The man will follow you around everywhere,
and I literally mean EVERYWHERE, calling you names, behind your back, because
he has nothing better to do. If your peace of mind is worth more than a 100
rupees, you will pay the man.
5.Ladies, don’t
travel alone at night in a tuk tuk. The driver will usually ask you if you
are married because in their culture it is highly unusual for a woman to travel
alone unaccompanied by a man, as it is still a patriarchal society. In this
case, you have two options.
Option A: you tell him that you are not married. In
this case, he will do his best to pursue you, and in a way that Western women
might find a bit creepy – he will stop the tuk tuk God knows where, in the
middle of the night, and want to take you to a restaurant. Even if you really
really really only want to go home and you tell him so. That happened to
another friend of mine. She barely got rid of him.
Generally speaking, Sri Lankan men are pretty stubborn
and a bit aggressive in their pursuit of white women because they are exotic to
them, make more money than them and live somewhere far away from Sri Lanka,
where (from their point of view) money grows on trees. In the hope of the green
card, they will try to do anything to woo us, even if it means being creepy in
their pursuit.
Which brings us to option B: lie to him that you are
married. You have to be married. End of discussion. Being
married means everything to them. Then, he will want to know how long. Have an
answer prepared, ideally the marrying age in Sri Lanka is around 22, 23, so
subtract this number from your age – and voila – you have the duration of your
fake marriage. Then, he will want to know how many children you have. The
number two is nice and even and keeps everybody happy. My fake children’s names
are Mary and John. Mary is four and likes to play with Barbies, John is two and
his favorite color is blue. Make something up, be creative. Then, he will want
to know what your husband does. Say that he is businessman. Then, he will want
to know what you do. Say that you’re a teacher. This profession is respected in
most countries, so you can’t go wrong with that. Trust me, it works like a
dream. Then, he will finally lay off you.
I hope that you found this post useful, if you have
any interesting stories about your tuk tuk adventures in Sri Lanka, please
share them in the comment boy below.
Love,
Teja xoxo
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